New year, new beginnings. That’s what I have in store for 2009. So I figured since I already knew there were big changes in store for me with the temporary living arrangement in Virginia and the upcoming permanent move to North Carolina that I might as well throw caution to the wind and add the possibility of dating again to the mix.
It’s been a long time since I dated anyone. In fact, not since 2004 have I actively pursued the idea of doing so. I’ve sort of fallen in and out of the same two relationships several times in the interim, neither relationship being exactly healthy for me. So with so many new things on the horizon, why not seek out a new relationship? Or at least new experiences, right?
So I re-activated and refreshed profiles that were still on Yahoo Personals and the BBW dating site, plus I did the eHarmony thing, even though there were enough questions to make my head spin. And what have I found? I’ve found out that the ‘free’ memberships are nothing but bait. You find someone interesting but you can’t communicate with them unless you join the service. And the services aren’t cheap. $60 a month for eHarmony, $30 a month for Yahoo Personals about the same for the Tangowire BBW dating site. And of course, I’ve been contacted by interesting individuals on all three. It seems pretty pitiful to send them one of those ‘icebreakers’ which gives them nothing except for letting them know there is a little interest there. Even eHarmony’s free communication weekend just whets the appetite by letting you follow their guided communication for a weekend for free, and then, when you’re almost at that point of direct communication…free communication weekend is over. It’s discouraging.
I realize these sites are there to make money, but I’m a girl on a budget. And dating sites are not in that budget at the moment. Wouldn’t it be cool if these sites also offered a ‘club-like’ alternative? Like a $5 cover charge that lets you communicate for one sign in session? Do you hear me all of you dating sites? We girls on a budget need an alternative to your high membership rates…are you listening?
Hmmm, no guarentees on quality of responders or what they are seeking but have ya tried Plenty of Fish?
Oh, and good for you!!! I’m glad you’ve decided it’s time.
Ummm, it’s supposed to be a secret, but one we decided late last year to forget about. But Shannon and I met online. We were on Lavalife. What was weird is that Kyle’s SEA also did respite work for Shannon and when Shannon showed her the picture I had online, she said, “oh, I know him, his ex-wife is a real nutcase”….. lol, so anyways, that’s how she found out our kids went to the same school. She didn’t have a picture up, but I did and we still went out for coffee three times. Then we didn’t see each other for two weeks because she thought I came on too strong. But three years later, we’re still together. It can work. We had both paid the $30 something for 20 minutes or whatever of email “chat” time, but after the first 10 to 15 had exchanged private emails and were off the site talking. It took about a week of emailing before we talked on the phone.
I never had any luck on Plenty of Fish. I looked at eHarmony to see what they were all about and thought it was a bit over-rated myself. The matches they came up with were all 5 to 7 years OLDER than me. And I was already old at 44.
Good luck and don’t give up. Big hugs.
Hey Gurl, Let me just say one thing, sometimes you have to kiss a few frogs on the road to the prince’s castle. As you know I met the f-bomb on Yahoo Personals. I was not a member but when he messaged me I sent him a flirt and then he flirted back . So when I got saw the opportunity I join thru a trial 3 or 5 day membership. They would not charge the card until my trial ran out. As soon as I was a temp member I messaged him my personal email. We began emailing each other and I canceled my yahoo membership before the trail was over. So there are ways to beat the system… Get creative gurlie… Let them know you can be reached on the yellow face that smiles, to converse, with smiling reen ice, tell them they need to be a bit of a dectective to find you…